tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7716443587185617804.post336806654052227618..comments2023-10-31T11:01:21.161-05:00Comments on *Lynnette Labelle* @Chatterbox Chitchat: Blog Crit of Jenn Maxwell's GIVING UP THE GHOSTLynnette Labellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03227593491562480538noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7716443587185617804.post-33301150639452196902011-02-28T08:46:43.167-06:002011-02-28T08:46:43.167-06:00Sure, Jenn. In the example you used, a man leanin...Sure, Jenn. In the example you used, a man leaning forward doesn't mean he's excited. It might mean he wants to be closer to someone or something. It might mean he's reaching for something. Maybe he's just changing positions in his seat. There really isn't enough of a reason for her to make an assumption like that. Now, use him leaning forward WITH something else and she can ASSUME she knows why he's doing something, but she can never really KNOW. If you word it that "It seems" or "She believed" or "He probably", then that tells the reader that the POV character is making an assumption based on what she's seeing. Does that help?<br /><br />Lynnette Labelle<br />www.lynnettelabelle.comLynnette Labellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03227593491562480538noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7716443587185617804.post-24410339324499853132011-02-27T14:28:04.654-06:002011-02-27T14:28:04.654-06:00I confess, I'm a bit confused about the POV sl...I confess, I'm a bit confused about the POV slips. Some did seem out of place to me, but others seemed just fine. For example, knowing the guy's excited when he leans forward. It might be better to throw in some more description, like he starts talking faster, or his eyes light up, etc. But when I read it, and it said he leaned forward, I instantly understood that he was excited, and I don't see why the main character shouldn't also.<br /><br />If you wouldn't mind explaining, I'd greatly appreciate it!Jennhttp://asinglebell.lorsini.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7716443587185617804.post-24374903222629752002011-02-23T16:26:56.221-06:002011-02-23T16:26:56.221-06:00Thanks!
Lynnette Labelle
www.lynnettelabelle.comThanks!<br /><br />Lynnette Labelle<br />www.lynnettelabelle.comLynnette Labellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03227593491562480538noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7716443587185617804.post-14008171012073413242011-02-23T14:00:51.827-06:002011-02-23T14:00:51.827-06:00I'd like to correct something you said. You a...I'd like to correct something you said. You are an "amazing" professional editor :) This looks soo good.Michael Offutt, Phantom Readerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10557969104886174930noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7716443587185617804.post-68690182031779756442011-02-23T09:42:42.180-06:002011-02-23T09:42:42.180-06:00This is a great sample of what a writer can expect...This is a great sample of what a writer can expect to see! TY<br /><br />~Fellow Crusader<br />KimKim Mullicanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08379949268188977298noreply@blogger.com