Friday, March 20, 2009

Wanted: Writing Time

For the most part, I accept my role as a stay-at-home mom. I love watching the twins grow and learn under my care. With my teacher background, I’m able to occasionally incorporate lessons into play without turning home time into school.

However, there are days, like today, where I morn my writing time. Granted, I understand the importance of my job as a stay-at-home mom, but that doesn’t always fill the void. If you’re a writer and don’t have a chance to write, your whole psyche’s affected. At least, mine is. I become withdrawn, irritable, and consumed with guilt because I SHOULD feel satisfied with my life. I have healthy children and a loving husband, who earns enough to allow me to stay home with the twins. Eventually, I’ll have more time for my career. I realize that, but somehow I still need a writing fix every now and again to get me through this period.

This feeling is hard for a non-writer to understand, which is one reason many writers form support groups. Do you have one?


  1. I'd love to join a local writing group, but the online connections I've made and the resulting networking I do serve greatly in the area. I wouldn't know what to do if it weren't for that! :)

    And I do understand where you're coming from, as a mom. I still have one at home all day (she'll start preschool in the fall), and trying to find the balance it hard. Of course, she comes first - as does my family as a whole - but I know I have to take my dream seriously. I'm still fine-tuning how I accomplish everything I'd like to. I sometimes doubt it's possible, because something must always fall to the wayside.

  2. I am going to have to pass this blog post on to a friend of mine who became a momma for the first time about three months ago. She is feeling the crunch of full time work and motherhood with little, in fact, no time to write.

    It is not easy to find time to write when you've got family responsibilities, that is for certain! Don't give up. Even if you can only fit in ten minutes every night before you collapse, it's a little something to sustain you. :)

  3. I think this is universal for every mom writer out there. I just came out of the end of this phase myself - my youngest started school full time this past fall... I've been a stay at home mom for more than 11 years and I have three kids, 11, 8, and 6... so there have been periods where there just wasn't any way to fit in writing. Between their school and extra curricular activities and bouts of sickness, infants not sleeping through the night - motherhood's a full time job.

    I never did connect to a real life writing group - so my online blogging writing group has become essential. Blogging sounds like such a little thing, but you do build friendships with other writers, get time to discuss things non-writers roll their eyes at, and I've even built personal relationships with people who started as blogging buddies and are now crit partners and beta readers.

    Writing is a pretty solitary pursuit, but it helps to have people who understand and as a community, writers tend to help each other up the rungs and are there to cheer or support when times are good or bad.

    I'm going back to work next month, for the first time since before I was married - so it'll be a new phase, fitting in the writing with working and motherhood. I think I can have it all - just not all at the same time... babysteps will get me there.

    Find the time that fits your schedule. I got in an amazing amount in the hour I waited during dance classes or swimming lessons... sometimes it's the middle of the night or early morning... find what works for you. Being a devoted mom doesn't mean you should push all of your dreams to the side. :-)

  4. Thanks for the encouragement, guys. I appreciate your kinds words.

    Lynnette Labelle

  5. I understand what you're saying, Lynette! I've started a few novels only to have them put on the back burner to look after my kids. A published author at my church assured me that "my time will come" when the kids are in school full time.