Recently, I posted Donna Hole's critiqued query letter. She has since revised it and I've critiqued it again. Here are both versions, so you can see the difference between them. I'll post the old version first.
Below is my detailed critique. Please select FULL SCREEN to view, then once the document is open RIGHT CLICK to ZOOM and view the comments.
Donna Hole's Query 1
Here's Donna's newest version of her query letter:
Donna Hole's Query 2
Thanks again for volunteering, Donna. The next winner of the query contest will have his/her query critiqued a week from today. Watch for it.
What did you think of Donna's revisions? Any suggestions on how she can further improve her query?